That’s a heck of a title, eh? It does however, encapsulate the theme of today’s thoughts on talking to kids about the debt the family finds itself in. Just because you’re not talking about the debt issues you as a parent are struggling with does not mean that the kids don’t know – or sense something is terribly wrong.
The children can sense tension. They can sense it if you’re tense, or if you and your spouse are fighting about finances – even if you take care to have those fights away from them, with lowered voices, and behind closed doors. They will know when someone is sleeping in the guest room, or on the couch.
The children will wonder why the phone is ringing. Have you told them not to answer the phone? They will ask why you are not picking up the phone. You may – or may not – come up with an excuse as why you are avoiding debt collectors. Even if you think you’re successful in convincing them that there’s a perfectly good reason why you’re not answering the phone, they will know that something is just not right.
Do they go to the mailbox or the post office to get the mail? Are they asking why there so much mail? Have you already told the kids not to pick up the mail out of the mailbox so they do not go looking through it?
My point: kids are not stupid. You can shield them all you want, but if the financial health of the family has descended into a bad place (and I’ve described above how the debt can push the financial health into a bad place) eventually they will know – one way or another. And with that said, I ask you this: is it not better for them to hear it from you and discuss it all with you – than to hear it from or discuss it with someone other than family?
Related posts:
- Talking to your Kids
- Storm Preparation: Talk to Your Kids
- Talking to the Kids: Dealing with Failure
- Unintended Consequences in Estate Planning
- When Parents are in Debt
Tags: Talking to your kids
