Yesterday, I met with a couple where we discussed their need to file bankruptcy. The husband expressed embarrassment at their decision to file and (like many of my clients) expressed concern that their employer or coworkers could learn about it. I did not think it was a possibility, and I told them so. But they told me something I felt the need to share with you.
Apparently, at his place of employment everyone is just happy and feeling fine (according to the client). Everyone has nice cars, nice houses and dresses well. No one there could possibly be considering bankruptcy. When my client looked at me and said “no one at my company is going through this”, I felt I had no choice but to ask him “how the $%@# do you know that?”
The thing with being so-deep-in-debt-that-you-honestly-don’t-know-whether-you’re-coming-or-going is that it’s not unusual to believe that you are completely and utterly alone. After all, your neighbors don’t look like they are in debt up to their eye-balls, do they? They drive nice cars. They have a nice house. They wear nice clothes. Their kids go to private school.
Or, you could look at it this way: They drive nice cars (two payments behind). They have a nice house (an adjustable rate mortgage with a home equity line of credit). They have nice clothes (and the credit card bills to go with it). Their kids go to private school (did I mention the home equity line of credit?).
In fairness, this is not about people with entitlement issues. My clients – like many more I am meeting nowadays – are finding themselves treading on thin ice because basic costs for food and energy are going up. Income is not. It’s not about them consuming more, it’s about their consumption costing more and it’s about families having to rely on credit to get basic things: food, fuel and clothing.
The fact is, no one sits around at work and shares their personal economic woes. No one is sharing how they are worried about the grocery bills, the gas bills, the kid’s dental bills, or how they lose sleep at night wondering if they can afford to heat the house this winter. No one wants to admit that the reason why they are “brown-bagging” lunch is because it’s all they can afford. No one walks around their place of employment and openly expresses how they feel their finances are pushing them deeper into despair.
If you think you’re the only one struggling in this delightful economy, then you’re flat out wrong. Your friends and your neighbors are likely struggling. Chances are, they too are embarrassed. They are also scared. And they also feel alone. But they also smile and put a good face forward. Just because they do, does not mean they are doing well. And just because you aren’t, doesn’t mean you’re alone.
Despite appearances, others may be, just like my clients, suffering in silence: too afraid and too embarrassed to talk about it. Their silence does not mean they are better off. It just means that unlike my clients, they may not yet be in a place where they feel they can do something about it.
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on Wednesday, July 16th, 2008 at 3:37 pm and is filed under Bankruptcy.
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Who’s Happy about this Economy?
Yesterday, I met with a couple where we discussed their need to file bankruptcy. The husband expressed embarrassment at their decision to file and (like many of my clients) expressed concern that their employer or coworkers could learn about it. I did not think it was a possibility, and I told them so. But they told me something I felt the need to share with you.
Apparently, at his place of employment everyone is just happy and feeling fine (according to the client). Everyone has nice cars, nice houses and dresses well. No one there could possibly be considering bankruptcy. When my client looked at me and said “no one at my company is going through this”, I felt I had no choice but to ask him “how the $%@# do you know that?”
The thing with being so-deep-in-debt-that-you-honestly-don’t-know-whether-you’re-coming-or-going is that it’s not unusual to believe that you are completely and utterly alone. After all, your neighbors don’t look like they are in debt up to their eye-balls, do they? They drive nice cars. They have a nice house. They wear nice clothes. Their kids go to private school.
Or, you could look at it this way: They drive nice cars (two payments behind). They have a nice house (an adjustable rate mortgage with a home equity line of credit). They have nice clothes (and the credit card bills to go with it). Their kids go to private school (did I mention the home equity line of credit?).
In fairness, this is not about people with entitlement issues. My clients – like many more I am meeting nowadays – are finding themselves treading on thin ice because basic costs for food and energy are going up. Income is not. It’s not about them consuming more, it’s about their consumption costing more and it’s about families having to rely on credit to get basic things: food, fuel and clothing.
The fact is, no one sits around at work and shares their personal economic woes. No one is sharing how they are worried about the grocery bills, the gas bills, the kid’s dental bills, or how they lose sleep at night wondering if they can afford to heat the house this winter. No one wants to admit that the reason why they are “brown-bagging” lunch is because it’s all they can afford. No one walks around their place of employment and openly expresses how they feel their finances are pushing them deeper into despair.
If you think you’re the only one struggling in this delightful economy, then you’re flat out wrong. Your friends and your neighbors are likely struggling. Chances are, they too are embarrassed. They are also scared. And they also feel alone. But they also smile and put a good face forward. Just because they do, does not mean they are doing well. And just because you aren’t, doesn’t mean you’re alone.
Despite appearances, others may be, just like my clients, suffering in silence: too afraid and too embarrassed to talk about it. Their silence does not mean they are better off. It just means that unlike my clients, they may not yet be in a place where they feel they can do something about it.
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Tags: Bankruptcy, Commentary - Legal
This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 16th, 2008 at 3:37 pm and is filed under Bankruptcy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 comment feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.